Nic Gibson's blog

OOXML, sigh

I've started working with OOXML recently, working on a project to get something more semantic out of Word. OOXML itself seems fairly reasonable as word processing formats go and getting something that has properly structured content isn't particularly challenging. As I'm not that familiar with OOXML, I have to read large chunks of the spec. I'm underwhelmed to find that it has obvious errors in it. I've just spent 15 minutes trawling the schema because an example in the spec seemed wrong. It is wrong. Runs of text do not contain paragraph styles. Ho hum.

Recruiters Again

I've been approached about the same job at JP Morgan about five times now. It's not one I can do given the requirement for 'solid banking experience' (I work in publishing, it's not the same dammit). OK I know I can do the job because the one highly clueful recruiter (hi Marcus) I deal with has told me what's involved. But I'm obviously not going to get it because I'm not from a banking background.

But... I've just been phoned by a recruiter who has just told me that I'm clearly not up to the job because I have no "XPath 2 schema development" experience. When I pointed out that there is no such thing as an "XPath 2 schema" I was told that is what the client asked for so I obviously don't know as much as I think I do.

Whatever drugs she's on, remind me to avoid them. What is it with the mental unfiltering that goes on between manager -> HR -> recruiter? Many recruiters seem to garble the requirement to the point of imbecility. I wonder how many jobs I've decided not to apply for on the basis of a garbled advert.

(Some) recruiters

So... I just got a linked-in invite from a recruiter who shall remain nameless. It says...

SOME RECRUITER* has indicated you are a person they've done business with at A RECRUITMENT AGENCY*

 
Hello,

I’ve seen your details on linked in and would like to find out if you considering a move a present.

I’m seeking a senior designer in kent – would you be interested?

Please let me know

So... I've never dealt with this agency before (they're in a part of the country I don't frequent - Bristol).  So... that first would be, well, a lie. Then she apparently has seen my details on 'linked in'. OK, so if she has seen my details why does she think that I might be looking for a job as a senior designer? I can't decide if this particular recruiter is more stupid,  more inept or more what than usual. Argh.

* names changed to protect the guilty.

I just wanted to say that

• Homeopathy is compete bullshit - but the placebo effect is powerful magic
• Intelligent design is creationism, creationism is pernicious bullshit
• Detox is bullshit for money - have a glass of water and go for a walk instead
• Liberty is too important to give up for a little security

Just needed to get that off my chest.

First Class Hypocrisy

I usually travel to work first class - we live on a branch line so the upgrade isn't too pricey and it means I can get some work done in peace and quiet.

Now, going home again the train is very busy between London Bridge and East Croydon. The other day it was so busy that the train was overflowing. A bunch of people (sensibly) came into the first class bit (the train is madly full, who cares where you end up). One businessman got on the train right before it left and stood at the end of First Class and announced (loudly and pompously) "I assume everyone in here has a first class ticket because I'm not bloody standing here without a seat if you lot shouldn't be here". Anyways, this rasta gets up and says "Look, if you feel that strongly about it, take this seat - I'm only in here because there's no room anywhere else". Arrogant prat sits down, the rest of the compartment resist the urge to tell him what an arsehole he is.

So, yesterday, Arrogant Prat is on my train home again. Along with his kids who have come home from either boarding school or university (not sure which) but it was clearly overseas because they were moaning about the flight. The ticket inspector comes round to check tickets. Arrogant Prat has to pay a fine because he only bought his kids second class tickets (Uckfield is an open station so you can just walk out without a ticket check if they don't do one on the train).

Arrogant Prat gains my nomination as hypocrite of the year.

CCTV vs the world

I've been thinking (far too much about CCTV) recently. A couple of articles on the register (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/10/28/police_photography_guidance/ and http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/08/23/camera_analysis/) come to mind. Even the Daily Mail (yuck, spit) has articles about this sort of thing.

Now, we have all those CCTV cameras, we have police CCTV vans, we have traffic wardens wearing webcams. What happens if we start photographing back? Take a picture of a CCTV camera (or a van). Post it online.

Someone else must have thought of this before.

Imaginary Friends

Many children have imaginary friends. Owen has an imaginary police force. He talks about 'my police' a fair amount. He explained to his great-grandfather recently that he had cooked a whole salmon for his police. The other day he told me that, when I can't see him, it's because he's in his police station.

He just explained the plot of Wall-E to Emily. Apparently, he went to see it, with his police, in London.

Ho hum.

ADE/OPS/Sony Reader, vol 1

There's a difference in behaviour between ADE and the Sony Reader. ADE displays the first file in the <spine> element as the first file in the output. The Sony Reader appears, in the presence of a page map file, to display the first file in the page map.

That's a bit of a problem when the first thing to display should be the cover page. We don't want to see a page number on the cover page. There's a workaround that seems to work for both - put the cover page into the page map file using something like:

<page name=' ' href='cover.html'/>

We are not fans of dodgy workarounds. Oh well.

The Loch Ness Misunderstanding

Last week we took Owen (and Pete but he wasn't really paying attention) to Loch Ness. As we drove along the lakeside Em was trying to explain about the lake and the monster. It went something like this:

Em: It's a deep and spooky lake and some people think there's a monster in it.

[Owen appears to ponder this and, a few minutes later...]

Owen: Mum, how did they get the spooky in?

[Em tries to explain what spooky means. She appears to manage to explain this. But, a few minutes later...]

Owen: What flavour spooky?

Me/Em:  Huh?

Owen: I'm guessing lime flavour.

Em: Owen, what do you think 'spooky' means?

Owen: It's everything in the world all mashed up and mixed with orange juice.

Me: Owen, that's a smoothie.

Owen: No, not with trees in it.

The Sayings of Chairman Owen

"Spiderman killed all the dinosaurs because they were too stompy"
"Spiderman has a manager, he tells him what to wear"